Yesterday morning, the MentalFloss homepage featured an article on dog naming trends. Although an interesting article, I got no farther than the first line of the fourth paragraph: “Anthropologist Stanley Brandes published a 2009 study of pet name trends as revealed by the gravestones at Hartsdale, America’s first pet cemetery.” Pet cemeteries? Those exist outside of backyards?

I left the article unread and googled pet cemeteries in Connecticut. I had found my afternoon adventure.

Although other pet cemeteries were closer (Trails End in Westbrook, Willowbrook Pet Cemetery in South Windsor) none had the reviews that Balmoral Pet Cemetery and Crematory did.

• “This place is something right out of a horror movie…when I drove up the driveway I could see the house in the close distance and all the doors were open, but nobody was around. The building…was dark and rundown and morbid looking. I…cried thinking who would leave their animal there to be cremated. If you love your pet, don’t bring it here!”
• “Beyond neglect. Pet graves lovingly marked by owners are overgrown or displaced. Memorial garden is a trash dump. Sad.”
• “I think the 2 reviews listed are very harsh on Balmoral Pet Cemetery. This is a very nice scenic resting burial place for pets. My little toy poodle who I had for 15 1/2 years is buried there, and she was like a baby to me. Believe me, I would never have her be there if it were not nice. For her burial ceremony, they put her in her little outfit, placed her on her blanket, and placed her head on a very cute satin pillow. Lovely, sweet ceremony. It’s in the country, so what do you expect. In summer months, things get a little overgrown. I have seen the area maintained, and I go there often. It is not a trash dump, by no means. That is very harsh!! I never saw trash around at all. Pet headstones are lovely, not displaced. It’s run by very personal people and they do their best. I promised my little dog at the age of 2 that I would bring her there, because we loved it up there, and I kept my promise to her when she passed at 15 1/2 years. The people are very nice, you get personal service. They are making a new building soon. Believe me, if my little baby is there, it’s a great place. I think it’s a great, nice, scenic resting place for any pet. The Housatonic River flows in front of it along Rt. 7. I am glad my little toy poodle is there, believe me. I would highly recommend Balmoral Pet Cemetery. Leaving a beloved pet anywhere is very scary in general. Trust my review, if you want a nice eternal resting place for your beloved pet.”
• “The next time I need a pet cremated, I wouldn’t hesitate to use them again, and I recommend them wholeheartedly. Worth the TWO HOUR drive for me. I would use them again.”
• “Our experience was excellent…Especially meaningful was the effort made to ensure that our beloved dog’s name and titles were correct on the paperwork provided to us.”
• “I have been a rodent parent for 13 years, so have gone to Balmoral often, as rats and mice don’t live more than 3 years or so. Alan always cremates a ‘family’ of my rodents together, ones who were cagemates, and it’s wonderful to know that they’re together after death as they were in life.”

I was surprised to see I was not the only visitor since the snow storm. Then I noticed all the other visitors were deer.

“I never saw trash around here at all.”

I returned home, satisfied by the day’s adventure, and finished the article. The next time I own a pair of pets, I’m naming them Mopsus and Mopsulus.